My You Story

That tear coming from my eye proves to me there is so much emotion behind this love of ours <3           I have a feeling I'm going to get a lot more female viewers today hahah. But I'm pretty sure she doesn't even read the blog. I just could not let this conversation go to waste. Last night as I ate dinner watching the Bachelor (yes I like that show), one of the girls became super giddy over the date she just had. I had been smiling with excitement for the girl on the tv because the way she looked at the gentleman was how I look at Marc. I get super giggly and smiley and really can't control my happiness sometimes. Well, the girl with me went on to chuckle and said, "Ughh, I can't stand when people act like that, love isn't even a real thing". You can imagine how butt hurt I was and shocked that she would say that to me of all people. Probably one of the biggest pushers of love. I love love and just about everybody knows that about me. I had t

          You know, I talk a lot about what it's like being Marc's wife, but I never thought about what it's like to be a husband. Mine specifically. It's so weird to think someone is at least somewhat equally in love with me. Enough to put a ring on my finger to show the world I'm his one. Of all the people around I was lucky enough to win over my husband. I can rattle off day by day why I'd pick him over and over  again, and he could probably do the same. I did so much throughout the years to show Marc I was in it for the long haul and that he was the one. I could only wish to see what was going through his head all this time. What moments to him were special? How did he decide to marry me? How long it took to realize this was the right thing to do? I'm really trying to wrap my head around the idea of someone loving me the way I love him. When he came to Indiana Friday night, the tears that formed instantly in my eyes were genuine. Every time I see him

Gotta keep it positive ^^^           I don't know whose idea it was to start work and school on Mondays, but I don't like them -__- If it weren't for them, I could be spending quality time with Marc right now because he wouldn't have work the next day, and I wouldn't have school. Monday's should be like a holiday. An actual rest day, cause lord knows, no one rests on the weekends. Marc came to my job today to say goodbye before he left, and I was really hoping when I came home he'd still be at the house to surprise me with a, "I have tomorrow off", but nope. I came home to an empty house with no Marc in sight. You can imagine how sad my face looked. Especially since Marc forgot all of his chocolate milk! Bruh. How?! I cannot get over how shocked I am he actually forgot them. This weekend was too short. I feel cheated. But then again, I say that every time Marc and I have to separate, but it's so true. Time goes by way too fast. Why can'

          Last night I raced home because Marc and I are weirdos and like to go to sleep at the same time, and I knew he was really tired from working all week. Of course, of all my shifts from this past week, yesterday I worked the latest. I felt bad because Marc had been reminding me how sleepy he was. So straight to the shower and bed I went. At that point Marc already told me he needed to close his eyes for a little. You could imagine the guilt I felt hahaha. So I'm in bed and Marc finally "open's his eyes", and long story short says to open the door. Sometimes we joke around by saying "come open the door", as if we were really there, but something told me to race downstairs last night. Herky and I ran down super excited and I turned on my flashlight to look outside and was scared and happily surprised to see Marc actually there. So much for my countdown haha, Oh well, this surprise was great! When I saw him, legit tears formed in my eyes. I was so ha

Marc and I walking into my surprise wedding. My sister greeting me with my veil, and my mom putting on Marc's boutineer. I wasn't sad, just trying to hold in my tears of joy!           Yesterday after Marc read the blog, neither of us could help but laugh at what he had realized. All these holidays we've spent together, and this year would be our first year ever as a couple. I wish you all could've seen how amazed he was. It's funny that every time we feel like something is so old for us, it's still so new. We haven't even been in an actual relationship for longer than a year yet (dating back to high school). <----- Now that's crazy! We've been by each other's side as friends longer than we have been in a relationship. You know how a couple of weeks ago when I changed my name and wondered how school would go? Well I'm noticing some of the differences I had predicted. Before when teachers said my full name, they had no hesitations sayi

          I haven't had a countdown in a while, and let me tell you, it is long overdue. Towards the end of last semester I didn't have as many because I found myself coming home often, and Marc coming to Indiana just as much. It felt like we were finally getting the time together that we deserved. Right now, we are currently going through one of the longest breaks of not seeing each other and it's dragging! I can't remember the last time I haven't seen Marc in a month and a half. We're getting close to reaching a full month and still have two and a half weeks left. WHYYYY! I feel like by the time Marc and I see each other I'll be practically done my semester (not really I'm exaggerating), but you get the point. 15 more days until I get to see my handsome husband and get to squeeze him in my arms so tight he can't breath. Yes, I'm going to squeeze him so tight until he realizes never to go that long without seeing me ever again. When he comes

          Today Marcs a big day (Yes I like to play on words with Marc's name). This is post number 100. It's crazy to think I still have 265 days left, and yet look at how far we've come. The last 100 days have been amazing. I not only got to tell Marc how much I love him, but I've been able to show the world too. We've come through so much in the past few months. We got married for crying out loud! It doesn't get any better than that. They say the first year of marriage is the hardest, and I don't doubt that for a second, but this blog is not created for me to focus on the bad. I may write about working through things, but I never want to be negative. There are enough negative things in this world we have to worry about. So when it comes to being with the person I love, I want nothing but positive vibes radiating off of it. I remember when Marc and I first starting talking, and how he called me his sweetheart. You're probably thinking, big whoop, it

Dear Hopeless High School Sweetheart,           I understand where you are coming from. It's easy to see you have a clear understanding of what you want in a partner, and what you had in this soulmate of yours. I don't usually tell people to just go for it, but there is something about your story that sounds different. You didn't say much, but what you said are the exact things I needed you to say in order to get this response from me. My response is for you to be as open as you need to. It doesn't matter when or where, I can see your heart is in the right place. A little birdie told me you'll be heading up to his college in a few weeks and you never know when you'll get the opportunity again. I know you have your doubts that there are better woman suited for him out there, but if you never give him the chance, you'll never get to see where you'll end up. One day you could end up being Mrs. _______ . Its refreshing to hear you are willing to fight f

          When I was younger, I had this obsession with reading the "Dear Abby" section of the newspaper. I was always intrigued about the issues people had and the responses Abby would give them. Sometimes when I get upset, I wonder why I was so obsessed with those articles, and looking back, it's because I always wanted to get advice from her. She had a way of snapping people back into reality and giving them the confidence to do what was necessary. Not only did I admire the wisdom that came from her answers, but I admired her job. A job dealing with other's issues. So, as a strong believer in Abby, I want to play pretend. Dear Abby,           I am a senior in high school, and I feel like I am at a loss. I'm a young single woman with many dreams and aspirations, but I feel I'm missing out on something (more like someone) special. For as long as I could remember, I've been looking for a husband. Having my parents and grandparents as couple role mode

          Last night I sat in my living room texting my sister back and forth as we watched Beaches (the remake), and I waited for one song the entire movie. One song that I couldn't wait to play. The reason I waited with such anticipation is because I knew on the inside why I loved it so much. When we listen to music, we're able to relate and give meaning to the words. As I listen to the words of this song, I can't help but think of Marc and everything he has done for me. By no means is he a silent supporter because of how much I speak about the support he gives me, but I truly wish you could see and feel the support he gives me. With everything he gives me, there is no way I could let him go unnoticed. If he ever told me that he didn't give me enough as a partner, I'd shut him down in a heartbeat, because he doesn't give me "enough", he gives me more than anyone could ever imagine. He's always ready to show me off, and take so much pride in ou

          We're one of those relationships that doesn't know where to fall in this category. Do we have old love for one another, or are we able to say our love is new? It's weird because I want to say our love is old considering our past, but the feeling of how important we find our love to be is still very new. Marc and I are able to love each other simply by sitting next to each other in an empty space, and still feel the connection as an older couple would. Yet, we giggle and flirt as if it were still our very first date. I forget the saying, but it's something like, if you continue to do things you did in the beginning of the relationship, there won't be an end. I believe it. Old love is great. Being able to just feel someone's presence is great, trust me. I'd kill to have Marc even in the same city as me right now, but that can become old after a while, and maybe even become some weird friendship. Don't get me wrong, having an actual friendship

          It feels like I've been writing these blogs forever. When I did the math, I haven't even made it a third of the way there. I know, sounds crazy. But all this time went by and I don't think I have ever spoken about why I started the blog, and if I did, I think I just brushed on it. They say there are five love languages: words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch. I feel like I've figured out Marc's two biggest loves and I believe they are words of affirmation and acts of service. By no means do I think he doesn't follow the other love languages as well, I just know those are important to him. When I first began this blog, we weren't in the best of places. I may have been a bit extra by creating a public blog, but I wanted Marc to see how much truth I was putting behind my words. I wanted to publicly and verbally express my affection, praises, and appreciation for having him in my life. I knew that wh

          Last night as I caught up on this week's episode of This Is Us  I found myself crying just about the entire episode. I'm pretty sure I've never had Marc watch any of the episodes, but if I needed him to understand how I felt about him, I'd send him the watch this week's. When you watch movies and love stories, they don't feel genuine. This one damn near ripped my heart out. Dr. K is an older doctor whose wife passed away a little over a year ago. He's still learning how to cope with her loss, and it was heartbreaking to watch. You could see how much she meant in his life. Not only as he spoke to her as if she were still alive, not only as he told his son to quit telling him to get over her death, and not only as he confessed how he didn't want to be without her any longer. Marc and I haven't even been married a full month yet, and this episode spoke volumes to me. I could only imagine living together for 50+ years and having to let go. 2

          Do you ever look back at moments when you realize you were so ridiculous and hype about that smallest of things? Well, it's easy for me to do that because I have so many considering how extra of a person I am. After walking past one of Marc's old houses yesterday I couldn't help but think of the time I walked to his first house my freshman year. My freshman year up at school things were kind of weird between Marc and I. We weren't talking but we weren't not talking at the same time. All I can say is, thank God I'm a boxing fan. He knew how much I loved boxing, and that was the year of the Canelo-Mayweather fight. On campus we didn't have pay-per-view so Marc invited me over. You can only imagine the excitement running through my veins. People were going to be at the house and see who I was there for. Marc offered to pick me up, but as per usual, I wanted to walk instead and be extra. For some reason in my head, that was showing Marc how much I a

          I'm home sick. There's nothing to it, just missing being at home with Marc and living our lives together. I'm pretty big on living a positive life, and I'm not immune to falling into negativity. It's hard to get out of these funks when you're missing someone or something. In my case, I'm going through a bit of Marc withdrawal. For the past several years we've been by each other's side pretty much 24/7. Last summer I went through a time of being really sad and just kind of in a crap mood. It's hard to be with your best friend all the time, and then have to learn how to be on your own. It especially didn't help that I was living alone, as I am right now. I never realized how big of a part Marc played in my Indiana life. Whenever I have one or two days off in a row, I can't just head over to Marc's house to just chill and hang out like I used to. I'm stuck with keeping myself busy by watching tv, reading, errands, or get

          It's truly a beautiful thing to have the opportunity to reflect. You have the chance to correct mistakes that you might have made, and you're able to remember the things you never want to forget. I'm not one to have a new years resolution, but if there is one thing I'm working on doing, it's becoming a better person for myself, and a better partner for Marc. This morning I took my time scrolling through many pictures, and I tried to remember what I felt in those moments. For some pictures I was reminded of the hurt Marc and I had been causing each other, and other pictures reminded me of the hope I never let go of. It's crazy to think of where we are today after looking at how crazy our past had been. If anyone knew what we were like the past several years, you're probably wondering, "How in the world did they make it this far?" Well, it was not easy. I remember learning in one of my classes that for every 1 bad incident between your

          Marc is always insisting I find new ways to learn new things, and for a while he even had me watching Ted Talks pertaining to my major or just things in general that I found interesting. When I was doing that, he'd ask me for a little summary on what I heard and my feelings about it if any. So I found a Ted Talk on how to maintain or work towards a healthy relationship. No relationship is perfect, including mine and Marc's relationship, so I figured I'd look into the research being done on this topic. Since these blogs are usually a summary or something I figured I'd let you guys see what I learned.           If there's one thing we all want, it's a healthy relationship. Ones where you have intimacy, security, respect, good communication, and a sense of being valued. According to the speaker and her research, these are the things a relationship needs to be healthy. If instead you find yourself arguing all the time, hostility lurks around your rela

          Never in a million years did I think I'd be that annoying nagging wife, and yet here I am today. You guys have probably all noticed this long ago, but it took me writing 89 blogs to realize it. I guess what really made me see it was the fact that this morning I texted Marc about 5 times before he finally answered saying he was trying to sleep in. But here's the kicker. My response was, "Next time text me to let me know you're sleeping in" I don't know about you, but I'm beginning to realize how ridiculous I must have sound. Maybe it's because we're so far from each other right now so it feels like I need to know what's going on even more than usual, but I guess we'll have to wait and see. After all, I will have about 5 more months of blog writing once I'm back at home living with him. Looking back, I think I was always needy. I have another story, and it's kind of embarrassing. I remember my freshman year at school on

          It's official guys. I am a Colón. It's weird thinking my last name isn't legally Rodriguez anymore, but I think I've done enough name talk and have to talk about what actually happened yesterday. Yesterday when I was out and about at the DMV and Social Security Office, I thought I'd just get paperwork done and leave. Not for a second did I think I'd have an eye opening moment, something that made me appreciate the person whose name I was changing mine for. I didn't realize how much Marc and I coming from the same area, or how he was raised could mean so much. While I was in the SS office, I had been the only female other than a very quiet older woman. When I walked in, the security guy asked a question, "How far is it from here to Philly?" I shouted out real quick, "4 1/2 hours" Immediately it sparked a conversation for everyone in the room how great Philly was. I texted Marc because I thought it was cool how I was able to sp

          Today is the day! After today, I shall no longer be a Rodriguez. I'm off to the social security office and to the DMV. I can't wait for the people who work at both places to ask why I'm changing my last name and for me to hand over my marriage certificate. It's funny because it's actually a lot more emotional than I thought it would be. I'm staring at the name Rodriguez and Colón and thinking, I won't be seeing Rodriguez anywhere anymore. It's like I'm letting go of  a part of myself. You're probably thinking, why, and I can't even understand why. I guess it's because I grew up the past 21 years as a Rodriguez, and I'm making a big step of taking on my husbands last name (It's still fun to say husband, ahhh husband!). I'll no longer be initialing RR, it's going to be RC now. When professors go in order of last names, I'll no longer be at the end of the list, but instead at the very beginning. When I fill o

          No, it hasn't happened just yet, but we're getting real close. Today is the day my marriage certificate will be arriving, and I can begin the process of changing my name. I don't think I've ever been so excited to receive something in the mail before. I think I've looked up what I have to do for this process about 100 times already. I can't believe how ready and excited I am to be carrying the love of my life's last name. I've already changed it on places that don't need legal documents, and I can't wait to have it on things like my driver's license, passport, or even my paycheck. It's going to be so funny when I pick up my check and they ask for my last name as they go searching for Rodriguez, and instead I have to interrupt them by saying Colón (pronounced cologne!) <---- I can get used to that hahahha. Or when I go to class with professors that I've had before and they look on the roster and don't expect to see

          Do you ever get in a panic mode when the person you love isn't responding, and things are running through your head and you can't get them to stop? Then you realize, it was all just a dumb phone issue. Yeah, I had one of those this morning. Last night out of no where, while Marc was eating I stopped getting texts from him, and I thought nothing of it. I thought maybe he's on the phone or doing something and can't get to his phone. About ten minutes after that I was like, okay then, I guess I'll head to sleep since I had a major headache and couldn't stay up. Well, this morning I wake up, extra excited to read his text and NOTHING. You can imagine how upset I was. Then things started running through my head like, oh my God, what if he choked on his food last night? What if he's being held hostage? I don't know! Anything could have happened. So I immediately call, freaking out, hoping he picks up. Of course, with a normal voice he picks up, an

          Today's post is going to be a little different. I know I told you before I browse the internet for ideas on what to talk about some days when I'm needing a little push, so I got to it this morning. I knew I wanted to speak about long distance relationships, considering even though Marc and I are married, that's what we have for the time being. It's easy to notice differences in when we're together and apart. Isn't that a given though? Of course it's a lot more difficult to communicate when you're so far and only have texting and limited phone conversations. But what frustrated me was the advice being given to those in long distance relationships, especially in younger people. That's probably why I was so butt hurt, because I felt like all the "advice" was being directed towards relationships like the one I have with Marc. The first thing that popped up, and kept popping up was "Signs you're breaking up" Well that

          Do you ever have those moments when you miss someone a little more than extra? Well, I'm having one of those days already, and I've only been awake for about 7 minutes. I'm looking at how long I've been in Indiana, and it's been a whooping 5 days -__- This semester is going to be a long one. I'm hoping once school starts days will go a bit faster, but I can't imagine how they will considering the past five days have been jam packed with work and they've still gone by so slow. I'm not sure what urged me two days ago, but I decided to clean my wedding band and engagement ring. Before I used to take off my rings as soon as I got in the house because I wanted to keep them bright and shiny 24/7, not that I don't still want that because I obviously do. It's just that I've noticed, I feel a bit naked without my rings. I'm sure you have at least one piece of jewelry that you wear every single day, whether it has meaning behind it

          If you have me on Facebook, you've probably seen our Christmas wedding video. Looking back, my very first post on this blog was of my engagement video. It's crazy to think, here we are 82 blog posts later and I have a wedding video to show off to the world. Oh and a marriage, no biggie. The reason I'm posting this video is because Marc and I were talking about the differences between our two weddings. Yes, if you're new, we got married twice. Once alone in Vegas on Christmas Eve, and the second time with our close family and friends on New Years Eve. We noticed at our Christmas Ever wedding, we both teared a lot more during the vows. There was something about the privacy and intimacy that allowed us both to be raw with our emotions and to let out what ever passionate tears we wanted. Not to say that we didn't cry at our other wedding, because believe, WE CRIED. We just cried about different things. The two weddings represent something for us, and I'

          After yesterday's post and a conversation with my mom last night it made it clear to me what the post had to be about today. Days weren't always lollipops and gingerbread houses for Marc and I. There were absolutely rough times. There were times we didn't speak for months on end, and somehow came back together. I'd like to believe it was fate or something, but my mom's question to me last night was, "How did you know?" She was asking because I have a younger sister who is having boy issues. I wanted to give the perfect answer, but I couldn't. It's a tough question to answer. I began to think back on what helped me keep the faith. And don't let me fool you, the faith was lost a couple times. Seeing Marc was a reminder of what I really wanted in life. Any time I would see him either at an event or walking on campus there was a gut wrenching pain telling me, "Becca what is your deal. Get over yourself." Think about it. It

          So, I'm sitting here trying to figure out what marriage means to me, and so many things are popping in my head. Like I do most mornings, I browse the internet to get my brain juices flowing, and bam! I come across a fellow blogger who practically took the words right out of my mouth. She started by saying how marriage is like being on a team, and I must add, this is my favorite team I've ever been on. When you're on a team what do you do for your teammates? You cheer them on, and wish them the best because everything you guys are doing is for a common goal. I used to think that there was an end goal to marriage, but the more that I think about it, the process of working through marriage is the great part about it. Marriage means getting through the rough times together and not looking back for a second, even when you have the slightest bit of hesitation. It means enjoying every moment you have together, the times when you're laughing or joking around, and e

          It's our first day since the day before our wedding that we aren't waking up together. I can't even describe how weird this feeling is. I got so used to waking up with you cuddling me in your arms and having your body heat keep me warm. I don't ever want to get used to waking up alone ever again. I've been teased by marriage and thrown back into the life of a college student. Back to emails, work, and lonely house. How I can't wait to get back to a house of three with my love and our dog, being able to wake up to the best person ever, making breakfast for the two of us, and feeling nothing but comfort in my own home. When Marc and I were together all week, we laughed at how much we could sleep. We say it's because of the comfy bed, but I'm starting to think we just slept better because we were laying next to each other. There is something so comforting in having your loved one next to you in such a time of vulnerability. This might sound cre

          Back to the drawing board. I'm in Indiana, and hating being back already. One more semester without Marc, and I'm not looking forward to it. What I am looking forward to, is making it back home to living with my man. One last semester driving back and forth from Indiana and Philly. Waking up this morning, I was dreading having to leave, but I knew it had to happen. Best believe I left a note waiting for Marc at home to remind him, my head and heart both know where home is for me. I'm coming back to school a married woman, and I can honestly feel the difference. You know how every year for your birthday, people ask you the very next day, "Do you feel any older?" Your answer is usually no. I kind of expected the marriage between Marc and I to feel a little something like that. I guess I thought that because I felt like I've been married to Marc forever, but this is so much different. I feel like I can walk with my head held a little higher, sway my

          Operation bum day, complete! One more day with my love for the next couple weeks. You guys have no idea how many times Marc and I have watched our engagement and wedding video. Marc's even watching it again right now as I type this. I remember during the summertime, any time I would get mad or upset with Marc, I went straight to our engagement video and starred at my ring for days on end. Now I have my engagement video, wedding video, millions of wedding pictures from both weddings, my engagement ring, and my wedding band. Each of those things are reminders to me of why I ran away and got married to my best friend. The past two mornings we were able to relax and have breakfast together and I can't believe I'm saying this, but I've enjoyed watching my HUSBAND play video games. Every time I say husband, a chill runs down my spine because my brain is still trying to process the whole thing. Like, HELLLOOO BECCAAA, YOU JUST GOT MARRIED TO MARC ANTHONY COLÓN! I